Monthly Archives: September 2013

The New Normal

Standard

Is this okay, to be struggling this much? Is it okay to have grades that aren’t A’s at this point in the year? Is it okay to do badly on the PSAT? Is it okay to never have any motivation ever? Is it okay to be missing so many practices, so many debate meetings, so many hours of school? Is it okay to feel like shit all the time and never know what I’m doing and suck at school? Is it okay to not be able to bring yourself to finish assignments, to not do your best in everything, to not be the greatest friend you could possibly be? It’s not okay, but I can’t. I don’t know how and I need to figure things out but no one’s helping me and it’s never ever been this hard. I wonder where my friends are when I need them, I want to talk to my mom about this but she doesn’t understand. I want to talk to my coach about this but every time I do, I repeat my problems over and over again and I don’t think she knows what to tell me. And this sucks, because she doesn’t realize that everything she tells me I take to heart so anything would be appreciated. It’s so much pressure and stress and sadness and overwhelming and I don’t know how I’m going to make it through this year, with all seriousness. I’m so terrible at everything and I don’t know how to fix this and there is literally no one there to help, ever.

xoxo Phoebe